And My Mum and Dad Were Down!!

What a packed night. It just gets busier and busier every week. Wordís obviously getting around that we are onto a winner!

Toby was poncing about in the woods with some thespians from A Midsummer Night's Dream (at the Royal Exchange in about six weeks, tickets available from the box office at very competitive rates), so the inimitable Jason 'entertainment' Cooke filled the role of compere for the first part of the evening.

Steve G - his eyes really are like that... Jason was well and truly tanked up on a cocktail of cough medicine and Guinness. But as Jason always says, "life with without booze is like sex without fucking, a load of wank!"

The first act was open spot Steve G. Steveís fairly new to stand-up and had a bit of tough time on the hardest part of the evening. I thought at the time that his material just wasnít up to it, but on listening back to the minidisc recording, he actually had a fair bit of good material, but it was wasted due to his haphazard delivery. If he could arrange his set and performance more coherently then he could be very entertaining.

My Mumís verdict: Not very good but heís got bottle.

My Dadís verdict: Unimpressed.

The second open spot was Adam Cadwell who had a bigger entourage than J-Lo and Mariah Carey put together. Fortunately, he didnít ask for the green room (the Thai restaurant bit) to decked out in white muslin!

Adam Cadwell The main theme of Adamís set was kids' TV, or more precisely, bad 80's kids' TV, like The Lowdown and Newsround. Adam couldnít understand how a disabled childís sticker collection could possibly be entertainment. Reflective stickers or not.

Adam also couldnít understand why kids would stay in watching ginger kids on Why Donít You making jelly, instead of being out playing footy or summat. Got a point. I agree with The Moomins being scary, Adam. Fucking chilling, a form of child abuse in my opinion.

Adam had a great Malarkey debut, and a great stand up debut. He was a little nervous at times but he did very well. Looking forward to seeing Adam again.

My Mum's verdict: That young lad was quite good wasn't he?

My Dad's verdict: Not bad.

After the break, Toby returned from the wilds of Alderley Edge to relieve the ailing (isn't that one of your songs, Jase?) Jason Cooke. Get well soon Jason. I donít know if I've mentioned this yet but Toby's rehearsing for A Midsummer Night's Dream as the RSC (tickets available from the box office) so the director organised some cast bonding session. Fuckin' hippy! Still, not bad getting paid to flounce about in the hills.

Martin Cassidy Next up was Martin Cassidy who has just opened his own club in Blackburn.

Martin, won the lottery on Saturday, but the BBC spent so much time fucking about selecting the numbers he destroyed his ticket in frustration. And you're right Martin, why do they cheer after every number is picked?

He wants to meet the bloke who came up with the concept of Can't Cook, Won't Cook. "Can't cook, go to the fucking chippy!"

Martin had tons of quality material in a classic stand up style, and he hates Ainsley Harriot, so he gets my vote! Top stuff.

My Mum's verdict: Oh, he was good.

My Dad's verdict: Very good. Proper comic.

Mick Davies Next on the Malarkey milk crate was fat lad Mick Davies. Mick reckons the only reason there is a thin bloke inside him is because he walked past one and he got sucked into Mickís flesh.

Mick blames his size on the most addictive substance known to man, Pringles! Which are apparently coated in heroin! Mick canít understand why they bother to sell them with a resealable lid!

Malarkey regular Mick, made his debut at the new venue in fine style. Great gags, good delivery, likeable style. Oh and Toby, "give it up, youíve won, we know itís shit over there!"

My Mumís verdict: I liked him.

My Dadís verdict: Not bad for a big lad.

Robin Ince After the chips we were treated to the fantastic Robin Ince. Finally at the new venue, absolutely tore the roof off. Iím not gonna try and describe Robinís material, because I just could not do it justice.

Robin had supreme command of Tribe Malarkey, chatting to crowd and especially the Malarkey regular with all the facial piercings: "I fuckiní love you Ďcos you look evil but happy. I wanna fuckiní fight with you naked in front of an open fire!"

Robin is Toby 'the tree hugger' Hadokeís favourite comedian, and fairly easy to see why. His intelligent, but sometimes sick, humour had the crowd in stitches from start to finish. Robin rounded off the perfect evening.

My Mumís verdict: Iíve wet my knickers.

My Dadís verdict: Not bad, but not really my cup of tea.

Toby was at his usual brilliance on Tuesday and promised to let everyone in for half price if Thatcher drops dead on a Tuesday. So anyone wanting to save a quid, you know what to do!

Apologies to anyone that could not get in on Tuesday because we were too full. Next week, get down earlier! See you at 7.30pm sharp next week!